My mom has always talked down marrying early because her first marriage to my dad (at age 22) ended terribly. But I know her past relationship isn’t necessarily indicative of how mine is going to be. Her negativity is taking a toll on me, especially since my boyfriend and I have started to talk about engagement – what do I do? – Twenty-two
Sit your Mom down for a heart to heart and explain that even though marrying early was not the best choice for her, you feel you are mature enough to realize what attributes you are looking for in a partner. Let her know your current boyfriend meets that criteria and you two are looking at the possibility of taking your relationship to the next level. Until you are actually engaged, you don’t need to talk more seriously about the issue, and if Mom continues with the negativity, change the subject. She’ll get the hint.
I recently got a raise at work, and my fiancé didn’t take to it quite well because now I make more money than him. Every time finances come up, he gets sulky and passive aggressive. How do I approach the situation so we can talk about it?
So that extra vacation and big screen TV you’ll now be able to get wasn’t enough to get him excited about your raise? Money is money, and the more you have at your disposal as a couple, the more you will be able to invest, play and think about your future. Throughout the relationship, it’s very possible the breadwinner of the family could switch back and forth, depending on how you structure your family life. Let him know that it doesn’t matter where the money comes from. What does matter is that you agree on how to spend and save as a couple. His ego is going to have to take a back seat on this one. If you approach the topic in a non-threatening “what’s mine is yours” way, I think he will start to see the upside to having a successful fiancé.
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About Angela Lutin:
Angela Lutin is Essentially Angela. Blogger, Advice Columnist and Dating Guru for the social media age—decoding modern love one tweet, text, and like at a time. Angela’s dating advice column, "The Naked Truth," appears exclusively each week on bocamag.com and in each issue of Boca Ratonmagazine. Her work appears regularly on the Huffington Post. She can been seen on MTV’s "Made" and Bravo’s hit show, "Millionaire Matchmaker." Crafting personal dating makeovers for her clients, Angela also maintains a private practice, which turns the romantically challenged into the relationship-inclined. Follow Angela on Facebook or Twitter.