It’s been a long week. Here’s a short recap of some fun Florida news stories.
Boynton Beach ice creamery named one the nation’s best
Ice cream is one of the few remaining topics in this world for which there is very seldomly bad news. It’s a topic that just defies all cynicism, so anytime there’s an opportunity to share ice cream-related news, we’re all too happy to do it. The Boardwalk Italian Ice & Creamery, a family-owned Boynton-based ice cream shop, has been named sixth best in the nation by USA Today’s 10Best contest. Congratulations to the Hurtuk family for serving up delicious scoops and making life in South Florida a little bit sweeter.
Airport joyride
Air travel is frustrating. Particularly in Florida airports, three of which were recently ranked as being the worst in the country for travel. We’ve all been maddened by flight delays and overall airport inefficiency, but whereas most of us just find a bar near our departure gate to knock back a few sedative cocktails, a Tampa man recently went just a few steps further by driving through an airport fence for a joyride along the tarmac. Allegedly, after Ryan Welch busted through the fence of Orlando International airport, he drove on runways and taxiways before stopping and exiting his vehicle at one of the gates, which is arguably the most insane way to not miss a flight. Fortunately, airport security tackled and apprehended him and no one was injured, but not before Welch caused $3,000 in damages and was presumably fast-tracked to a life position on the no-fly list.
A dubious honor
House Democrats, including Rep. Jared Moskowitz, who represents Boca Raton, have introduced a bill that would rename Miami’s federal prison after Donald Trump in light of the former president’s recent 34 felony convictions. Now, does this bill have any chance of passing in a state where the governor has devoted himself entirely to Trump’s presidential run? Absolutely not. Is it funny? Mildly. Would it be more useful for our representatives to focus on introducing (and passing) legislation that actually benefits Floridians as opposed to petty political theater? May we live to find out.
Monopoly: Fort Lauderdale
Fort Lauderdale is the latest city to be given the Monopoly treatment, with a customized game board featuring the city’s biggest attractions set to be released this December. Honestly, it’s a match made in heaven. A game where the whole point is to be a landlord that price-gouges renters set in one of the most expensive rental markets in the nation? It’s almost too perfect. No word yet on if the set will include a complimentary bucket of water to flood the board with every time it rains.
Citizens Property Insurance policyholders may be in for a price hike
To understand why Florida’s largest property insurer is once again considering hiking rates for policyholders—to the tune of 14 percent—it helps to put yourself in the position of someone on the Citizens Property Insurance board of governors by purging yourself of all empathy and looking at the world through the cold, empty eyes of a lizard. Sure, some Florida residents who have lived here their entire lives are being priced out of their homes due to a rapidly escalating affordability crisis. But as the insurance provider of more than 1.2 million Floridians, you have the opportunity to squeeze them for a few more dollars before new insurers set up a foothold in the market. Looking at life simply as a numbers game, how could you turn down such an opportunity?
